This craft, that field trip, expensive curriculum, more snuggles on the couch during staged photo reading time … are homeschool blogs bringing you down?

I have read recently how even moms with newborns are now “homeschooling”.

Really? Homeschooling at birth?! I was just trying to get baby to eat and sleep. Having never held a baby before I felt like I was the one being educated!

I’ve read blogs with barely toddlers consider themselves homeschooling, I think that’s sweet. Watching PBS shows was far more of a relief / time out for me than claiming to be a homeschooler.

I taught my sons their colors and numbers (1 like Thomas, green like Percy), but assumed that’s what all great moms do. I know plenty of great moms who did the same thing, but their kids attend public school.

In my funny little hardwired way of thinking … I don’t consider staying home with chalk, bubbles, and Candy Land the same as “homeschooling”. Maybe then we’re all homeschoolers??

Homeschoolers are great moms, but not all great moms are homeschoolers

As a homeschool blogger, I can tell you it’s not all pretty pictures and easy going.  Promise!  I just didn’t catch a photo of tears during reading, anger at long division, refusal to diagram a sentence, the science experiment flop, or the mess after a long day.  Well, maybe I have shared that photo before.

If you are a mom who loves her children, spends quality time raising them, and sends them to public (private, whatever) school  - you are still a great mom. You don’t have to homeschool to be a great mom!  You just have to love your kids, show them Jesus, and be available.

Don’t let homeschool blogs (even mine) ever make you feel like you’re not a great mom!

As much as I love homeschooling – because it fits with my husband’s schedule so we can be together as a family – I do not think homeschool is for everyone! And that’s okay!! 10 Reasons Not to Homeschool.

I love homeschooling.  I get to lecture all day.  But God has been telling me it’s time to stop lecturing.

This week the boy did not receive a “tip” on his tae kwon do belt. A “tip” signifies he has completed the learning and can move on. After four tips he is invited to test for the next level belt.

My son walked into practice certain he was getting his next tip. He had not practiced all week, but he felt he deserved it.

He didn’t get it.

They told him to practice over the weekend. His head hung so far forward I thought it would roll right off his shoulders.

He shot me a dirty look on the way to the car.

He sighed heavy in the backseat.

So, I started my lecture.

Did you practice this week? I didn’t see you practice? Do you think you can just walk in and get something because you showed up? Do you think Michael Phelps just jumps into the water and wins gold? No. He practices every single day. Did you practice every single day? I don’t care if you’re a black belt but you can’t expect to show up on the day of practice and expect to be perfect without practicing all week.

And on for a good few minutes more.

I stopped at the store, locked him fuming inside, and ran in to pick up a pizza.

Heading back to the car revelation poured down over me.

Stop Lecturing.

I put the pie in the trunk and opened his door. I leaned far into the car and grabbed him.

I stood there hugging him and his whole tense body immediately relaxed into his mamma’s embrace.

I didn’t let go quickly.

Thank you he whispered into my hair.

Stop Lecturing

Mom, love them.

Right where they are in their mess and mistakes. Love them when it makes all the sense in the world to you and absolutely none to them.

Love them when you know you’re so right and everything in you wants to lecture.  Love them when you can’t wait to make your point. (ahem)  Love them when you think they have some kind of lesson to learn.

Because the lesson is grace.

God gave us His Son without lecture.
God forgives us without lecture.
God hears our prayers without lecture.
God loves us without lecture.

Why do I have such a hard time offering the same to my children?

I’ve been wondering, what would my day look like if I were to keep calm and parent on?

I have a few ridiculous confessions to make today, and I’m hoping God is going to weave them together well.

1. Before this week, I have never seen one episode of Downton Abbey. Truth be told, I thought it was called Down Town Abbey. (blush). When my aunt described how much they loved the show and the new season aired twitter went crazy with excitement.

“If you love Jane Austen …” I was teased.  However, a long time Pride and Prejudice fan I was not easily tempted. Besides, we don’t have cable. But then I realized Downton Abbey Season One is on Netflix.

2. As much as I am a fun purposeful mom with all the crafting, projects, and field tripping excitement ~ the flip side to that coin can be a little … ugly.

It’s safe to say if things are not going my way I’m easily frustrated.  Quick to shout. You might say I’m a dead-horse-beating-lecture-giver.

Don’t think I’m hard on myself, hubs has reminded me of Ephesians 6:4 often. (although it does read “Fathers”, so maybe mothers are not capable? yea right).

So what does all of this personal information have to do with …

Keep Calm Parent On

This week I’ve managed to watch all of season one, and find season two of Downton Abbey. I am not in love with the show rather hubs was in China and I’m a terrible sleeper when he’s away.

Keeping in mind this is not a documentary, I’ve been enjoying the way the family handles themselves – giving clear direction, not begging, nor frustrated something needs repeating.

And in my world of 10 & 5yr old boys … oh how things need repeating.

I am a little moved with how the staff works hard, and has pride in the home estate. All while I sling last night’s dishes in the sink and let them soak, again.

Don’t get me started on the well manicured characters and my permanently wrinkled attire.

I can’t help but admire the reserved nature. It is refreshing to watch a show where the ladies are behaving well.  At least with few: dramatic outbursts, fits of shouting, acts of rage, emasculating habits, or soul killing words.

But it’s just a show, right!  And there are things I do not like about this show.  Yet the tug on my heart has been there all week.

I feel a conviction. My real life can be a little better.  A litter more peaceful.  Am I striving for excellence in my reaction?  No surprise my word for 2013 is QUIET.

To quiet the flip side of that coin.

I want to believe God can use a television show to stir up a desire in my heart for a more peaceful home.

To keep calm parent on.

(you may or may not want to go back and read this post in a most excellent English accent ~ indeed).

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